Today, we have a session at a camp that I am volunteering at that dealt with letting go of emotions. The teacher explained that laughter and crying are two sides of the same coin. She said that sorrow and happiness are two side of that same coin. I had a profound experience in this workshop as a volunteer.
There was one person that everyone in the group was lacking compassion with. We were all pointing out the things that she was doing wrong. She wasn’t being engaged with the rest of the group. At one point, she walked in front of the entire group while the session was going on, unplugged her phone and walked back to her place in the back of the room with her face buried in the phone. After she walked out I followed her.
People are not bad. When people are being perceived as bad, we often forget that they must have forgotten their importance or, maybe, they have some serious stuff happening that won’t allow her to be calm and loved. So, I followed her to the stairway and asked her if she was ok. Of course she told me that she was ok. Then, I asked her if she was present to her actions. She stared and me blankly. She obviously was not.
I told her what I had observed. I watched her walk in front of a room full of people that we had told not to be on their phones. Then, after that walked with her phone back in front of all those people to sit down in the back of the room to bury her face in her phone. I explained to her that the volunteer team needed her. At this point, my frustration was second to the importance of her understanding that she is valued and loved.
By the afternoon session, she was dancing and smiling. I have no idea if my interaction influenced this but it made me so happen to she her smile and have a good time. She has been pacing around the room for 2 days with her phone in her hand checking her email. People need to know that they are loved. It is our job to make sure that they can’t forget that.